I guess it’s hard for me
to process
even believe
that I can be loved
to this degree
I am hurt broken and sad
like a clown
I wear a smile
a mask
I question
could I truly be loved
so beautifully
so wholly
so desirably
I always thought
I loved too hard
too much
way beyond the brim
overflowing
only to face utter ruin
so I gave up
I resorted to my
cave within
where I would work
silently
guarding my heart
from
every passerby
incase I would fall
again
upon a harmless
knock
so I shielded myself
from curious gazes
who have no right
to see my cries
my eyes downcast
my heart empty
afraid to die
once again
I stayed aloof
then you arrived
ruining my life
my walled city
fell to dust
my free spirit
caged once again
yet free once again
by your love
neither here nor there
I’m ruined once again
until we unite
as one again
I love you